Monday, March 31, 2008

Wheel on the Bus At Gymboree

A strange occurence took place at Gymboree this weekend. Shortly after bubble time, it was lap time. Our usual instructor, Amy, had the day off so Julie took over. We started with the Noble Duke of York and then started The Wheels on the Bus. I couldn't believe my ears!!!

We sang: "The Wheels on the Bus go round and round all around the town". I said to the dad next to me, I can't believe they are not going "round and round here at Gymboree". His response was, "She must have not gotten the memo".

Jake only has four more weeks of his Saturday Level 4 class and then that is it for me. My wife is going to take him to art class on Thursdays and I am going to take him to the pool over the summer!!

Wednesday, March 26, 2008

Enough With David Archuleta

I never quite got David Archuleta and why the judges/voters on American Idol kept persisting he was fantastic. The little 17 year old dork with the horsey voice and the aw-shucks attitude just rubbed me the wrong way. He seemed nice enough but I couldn't figure out why the judges, especially Simon projected him to win the entire competition shortly after Hollywood week. Week after week of horrible adult contemporary songs like Another Day in Paradise, Imagine, one of the bad Beatle songs kept getting me fired up. What was wrong with me that I am the only one that can see this guy sucks.

At last a chink in the armor last night. After his performance of what to me sounded like some Christian Rock song (Oo ooh-ooh-ooh) my wife looked and me and told he she wasn't into it. Randy still had the myopia and said that it was a hot one. Paula mummbled some non sense about what she loved about David was that he stayed true to who he was. At last Simon broke him down and said that it sounded like a theme park performance where he could imagine animated creatures around him. Yes! Vindication!!

Finally, I can rest assured that I am not the crazy one. Sorry David. I wish you well on your cameo in the next High School Musical film, but hope your time on American Idol comes to an end shortly.

Monday, March 24, 2008

Lifetime Fitness - Oy Vey

Yesterday was Easter and my wife, son, and I were going to go to Lifetime Fitness to do some exercise. This is a big step, especially since this is the first time my wife was going to let him be in the hands of people we have never met before. We are aware of the holiday so we call ahead of time because initially, we wanted to go in the pool. Here is a transcript of my phone call to Lifetime to see if the pool is open.

Guy: "Lifetime Fitness"
Me: "Hi. I was calling to see if you have family swim today"
Guy: "I am sorry we don't because of the holiday"
Me: "Oh. Well is the child center open today?"
Guy: "It is. Let me see. Oh! It opens at 9:00"
Me: "Great. Thank you. Bye"

So, we make our way out there, pack the big diaper bag. Put my son in his jacket, which he hates. We drive 10 minutes to the health club, unbuckle him and sift through the half dozen bags we brought to find the membership card. We walk in, go down the long hall, and see that the child center lights are off.

I walk up to the guy at the membership desk, Jeff, and I say to him, "Jeff. Why did you tell me the child center was open. This is a big inconvenience?" Jeff replies that he is sorry and I go to speak with the front desk supervisor and tell her she needs to communicate changes in schedules to her staff. After tap dancing for two minutes she finally apologizes but it really just soured my mood.

I did end up going later on and they played the same songs they always seem to play - "Oh, Pretty Woman", "Californication" , some Ashley Simpson song where she acts like a femmebot, and James Blunt's "You're Beautiful". I watched some of the tournament on the TV, which, by the way, if I am paying $125/month and you aren't going to give each treadmill a personal TV, can't you at least afford HD?

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Gymboree Songs

So Gymboree seems to be popular by my viewing public. So, here are some song lyrics to some of the top hits at yours and my favorite children's place. Not that my son is coming close to 18 months and the weather is getting warmer, we are going to take a break from old Gymbo. I'll try to put up more songs as I remember them.

Bubbles In The Air
(sung to If You're Happy And You Know It)
There are bubbles in the air, in the air
There are bubbles in the air, in the air
There are bubbles in the air
There are bubbles everywhere
There are bubbles in the air, in the air

There are bubbles way up high, way up high
There are bubbles way up high, way up high
There are bubbles way up high
There are bubbles in the sky
There are bubbles way up high, way up high

There are bubbles way down low, down low
There are bubbles way down low, down low
There are bubbles way down low
There are bubbles on your toes
There are bubbles way down low, down low


Gymbo Dance(sung to Wheels On the Bus)
Gymbo The Clown Goes Up and Down
Up and Down, Up and Down
Gymbo The Clown Goes Up and Down
Here at Gymboree

Gymbo The Clown Goes Side to Side
Side to Side, Side to Side
Gymbo The Clown Goes Side to Side
Here at Gymboree

Gymbo The Clown Goes a-boogie oogie oogie
boogie oogie oogie, boogie oogie oogie
Gymbo The Clown Goes boogie oogie oogie
Here at Gymboree

Come Under My Umbrella (sung to Did You Ever See a Lassie?)
Come Under My Umbrella,
Umbrella, Umbrella
Come Under My Umbrella,
It's going to Storm

There's Thunder and Lightning
and wind and rain
Come Under My Umbrella,
It's going to Storm

This one bugs me because it doesn't rhyme but I dig the parachute(umbrella) so I let it slide

Monday, March 10, 2008

Checking Out Lifetime Fitness Pool

I have been taking my 16 month old son to the pool the last two weeks at Lifetime and we have a pretty good time for about 45 minutes. He plays with the bubbling springs that pop-up, spins the rings on the partition between the waterslide area and main pool, and pours the water from his cups that we bring along.

Jake is both fascinated and fearful of the mushroom fountain in the middle of the pool. He craws my face when we get close but when I back away, he points to it like he wants to stick his hand through the wall of water.

Our other favorite activity is to avoid the unsupervised kids who rough house in the pool like they are part of the WWE Smackdown. I tell those little jerky kids to screw off and leave me and my boy alone.

The real fun begins in the family changing area. I try to not drop Jake on the tile flooring while he squirms as I try to give him a shower. The area is reserved for people with opposite gender children but I don't really care. I am not taking Jake into the men's locker room where hairy old men don't mind being naked and taking 30 minutes to get dressed. In my most recent visit, there was a 70 year old wearing a translucent skin tight speedo. Jake's eyes are already burning. I don't need him to be exposed anymore to strange dudes.

Friday, March 7, 2008

Sitting in My High Chair

A lot of people have been entering this website trying to find the lyrics to the Gymboree hit "Sitting in My High Chair". Here are the coveted lyrics (sung to the tune of Short'nin' Bread)

Sitting In My High Chair
High Chair, My Chair
Sitting In My High Chair
Banging My Spoon

Bring on the Carrots
Bring on the Peas
Somebody Feed This
Baby Please

Sitting In My High Chair
High Chair, My Chair
Sitting In My High Chair
Banging My Spoon

Bring on the Jelly
Bring on the Bread
Somebody Get This
Baby Fed