Saturday, November 17, 2007

Gross Act of Kindness

When I think back to some of the disgusting things I have done in my life, surprisingly, not too many things pop up. I suppose I am pretty pompous. True, I was a janitor as Disneyland for four summers. On one occassion I did pick up a cheeseburger that had been thrown away, put it in my pocket and ate it later. But, it was on the top of the heap, was completely wrapped up in it's McDonald's wrapping, and had not bite marks or larva on it. The image of George Constanza eating the donut comes to mind.

Recently, I did do something one could construe as being gross. I see it as an act of kindness. My son, Baby Jake (who shortly will be little Jake), had a bad cold. He kept having boogers flushing out of his nose. Wanting to clear his nasal passage, I took the aspirator and sucked out all that was avaiable. He did not take too kindly to this and any sane person would take exception if someone tried to insert a large plastic bubble in their nostril.

To prevent this from happening again, I put my mouth over his nose and sucked. The mucus came into my mouth and I immediately spit it into a napkin and washed out my mouth. Gross? It is hard to argue otherwise. However, it is also a noble act as Jake was most appreciative.

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Liberal Snob

I am not partial to one political party or the other. They both have major downsides - self-righteous pompous jerks on both sides who won't try to compromise on anything. I do have a specific beef with the selective liberals (see earlier blog). These are folks who are open to the most bizarre deviant behavior and mock those who lead a normal life.

The main weapon of the selective liberal is their dollar store vocabulary. They believe if they drop words such as nepotism, gentrification, and nihilism they have a thought process that is greater than the general public. In truth, the selective liberal is nothing more than a thinly veiled insecure individual who because they did not succeed in sports or have a tolerance for lactose, they have to fill that deficiency.

People - why can't find a common denominator in life and use this as a basis to get along. Since sports seems to be somewhat exclusionary, I nominated American Idol.

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Creed Sucks

I was on the treadmill yesterday and was horrified upon seeing the stupidest video I have ever seen. It was Creed's With Arms Wide Open. I know the song is about lead singer/idiot Scott Stapp becoming overjoyed on the arrival of his new son but the video is so lame. Ugly Stapp is singing in Ireland or Scotland and then all of a sudden bombs come falling down on the Earth. Then the wimpy guitar player with an ugly soul patch plays a pathetic solo and the video ends.

Thank God the period of these talentless weasels being played on the radio is over. I feel bad for the nice little church goers who both the albums of these hypocritical bastards. Especially Stapp who claims he is Mr. Christian. "I created my own prison. It's My Sacrifice. Jesus takes me Higher". What a load of crap from this guy.

This is the same guy who performed a drunk show in Chicago slurring his words on stage in a typical pathetic performance. He also was filmed banging a girl with Kid Rock. He also tried to start a fight in a tattoo parlor after he overhead someone saying something about him. Other random acts of idiocy include getting into a fight with 311 and getting drunk at a poker tournament and trying to force himself on Howard Stern's fiance Beth . Recently, Stapp was also was involved in a domestic violence act by throwing a bottle of Orangina at his wife.

Here is a complete article about lame-o's Creed from Rolling Stone. It mentions how they have "Fallen from Grace" but were they ever graceful? I thought they always sucked

Monday, November 5, 2007

My Encounter With Morrissey

The Date: October 17, 2007
The Venue: Genessee Theatre, Waukegan, IL
The Attraction: Morrissey

My fanaticism with Morrissey and his former group, The Smiths, has lasted over 20 years. I had seen Morrissey in concert nine times prior. October 17th was to be my 10th show(the first was way back in 1992 at UCLA Pauley Pavilion).

Usually, when I attend a Morrissey show I have to drag my wife or pay for an extra ticket and bring my brother-in-law. This concert, I was going solo. There would be nothing to slow me down in my pursuit to make it on the stage and give the Mozzer a hug.

Driving up from the near Chicago suburbs, I was trying to get myself in the mood for the show. Unfortunately, I took my wife's car that she drives Jake around town in. Instead of hearing the Your Arsenal or Vauxhall and I album, I was left with the Putamayo Children's songs, Phil Collins, and Dixie Chicks.

As the show started, there was an instant rush. The band hit the stage and an instant feeling of exhilaration overtook me. Song after beautiful song poured through the speakers. The encore began and some stage invaders made their way up during "First of the Gang To Die". Nothing was holding me back this time around. I excused myself past the people in my row, darted to the left side of the stage and used the speaker for leverage to make my way up. Within an instant I was on the stage and made my way towards Morrissey. Almost instantly a security guard gave me a semi headlock. The momentum was too strong though as I kept advancing. The security guard pulled be back but not before I grabbed Morrissey's forearm. After countless hours listening to his music, spending close to $5,000 on music, concerts, attire, etc., and years of admiration, I was able to touch the person who so well defined my adolescence. Thank you Steven Patrick Morrissey for an unforgetable night!

Rock N Roll Quiz

Who got me a subscription to Rolling Stone? The magazine comes to my house every two weeks and is filled with articles on bands I actually care about. There are articles about Bruce Springsteen, The Killers, The Clash, Pearl Jam, Kanye West, etc. Although I haven't search hard, I have not come across mention of Good Charlotte and My Chemical Romance, which is a great thing.

One online challenge the magazine pointed me to was a Rock N Roll quiz available online. These aren't gimme's like "Whose wife did Eric Clapton write the song Layla?" (answer: George Harrison), but some real toughies. By taking the quiz, you will find out:
  • The rock star that was a classmate of former Dallas Cowboys head coach Jimmy Johnson
  • The reason behind Jimi Hendrix from the Army
  • The meaning of the words "Gunter Glieben Glauten Globen" are heard on the beginning of Def Leppard's Rock of Ages
  • The Oscar winning star that appeared in Madonna's video "La Isla Bonita"
I scored a respectable 38, which the quiz creators deemed as "WHIZ". Try it yourself - click here